January 22nd, 2011 by MIchelle

It’s 1:16 AM. I’m at “home” in the Great Falls Inn. Again thinking about Danny. He fell asleep watching Harry and the Hendersons while I sat next to him holding his hand. With the 24 hour babysitter it’s tough to get some alone time with Danny now. As much as it is necessary, I also feel like between Conor and I we’ve got the night shift covered. There are things you would do and say with your boyfriend that you wouldn’t do or say in front of someone else. It’s kind of awkward with someone sitting in the corner of the room being attentive to every movement Danny makes. All for the better though. If it will prevent Danny from any of his escapes then I’m okay with that. I certainly don’t want that to happen again.

This website and the outpouring of support, love, and compassion is astonishing. It’s mind blowing. It’s something we should do everyday.

We should…

…show our love and support to all of our family and friends.

…be there for people and listen to them when they are down.

…bring them up and try as hard as we can to put a smile on their face.

…cherish every waking moment of life and especially moments spent with those you love.

…remind them that they are loved and that no matter what happens they will have a friend by there side.

This list could go on for days and days, but I think you get the point. It’s a shame that it takes something so life altering to bring these feelings up sometimes, but it’s a blessing that we still have today and tomorrow to be there for Danny and to do all of these things for him. You still have today to do the same for your family and friends. Aside from the obvious lesson learned from this accident, to wear a helmet, there are many more lessons that I am learning, as I’m sure you are too.

I noticed myself smiling more at strangers when I pass them on the walk to the hospital or in the hospital. It’s not always well received on the 5th floor where the ICU is. Sometimes I walk away feeling bad that I smiled from their reaction, but I understand. I don’t think I looked any strangers in the eye for a week after January 3rd.

One day when i was getting in the elevator at the Great Falls Inn a woman introduced herself to me and told me that she was having a very hard time because someone close to her was sick. I got in the elevator with her and her family and she just grabbed me and gave me a big hug. When the elevator stopped at level two I had to pull away and get out. All I could say was, “stay positive.”

Last night when I arrived in the waiting area for the ICU I saw a family sleeping on the floor. It made my heart sink remembering the night I slept there. I hope their family member gets to give them a hand squeeze and a faint smile again. It’s such an amazing feeling, that hand squeeze. It makes time stop and your heart overfill with happiness, promise, and passion.

I’m looking forward to what tomorrow brings.

-Michelle

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

If’s simple all you gotta do is get something together that is Danny related and send it in to 603-496-6621. You can also send it to donations@dannyisthebomb.com

Send in ANYTHING Danny related! Just take a minute and do it right, whatever it is that you do.

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

The first round of bracelets went in the mail yesterday. They should arrive to everyone in the next few days. If you don’t see yours by the end of the week please feel free to email donations@dannyisthebomb.com. Thanks again to Alyssa Hussey for getting the ball rolling on the bracelets!

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

Danny Is The Bomb!

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

These “DCT” drink specials were smooth smooth, from Flatbread Jan 20.

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

To Ellie, Conor, David, Michelle and Joe,

I just wanted each of you to know that in no way can I remotely fathom what you are going through, but as a family member, I absolutely share your pain and your joys as Danny slowly comes back to us.

From my mom, my sisters, brothers-in-law and all of the cousins I can tell you that we have been devastated by this experience. We are all forever changed by it – in ways we can see and in ways we have yet to experience

I have hope, faith and love, and a great deal of it, but I also have a sorrow that goes deeper into my soul than anything I have experienced since dad died 15 years ago.

I have a pit in my stomach that I can’t get rid of. I cry at the drop of a hat. I squeak by each day, doing what is demanded of me and at the end of the day I am spent, empty, hollow and flat.

I can’t wait for night to come so I can go to bed, then I can’t sleep. Or, I fall asleep and wake up hours later, in the middle of the night and wish that I could be in room 5109 with Danny, Conor and Michelle.

I drive home after work and drive right past my house because I am distracted, worried or crying.

I’m hungry, but I don’t feel like eating. I can’t stand being alone but I don’t want to be around people. I just want to be in the presence of my family and a few close friends.
I want people to ask me how Danny is doing, but I don’t always know how to answer.

And it’s selfish, but I want someone to ask me how I’m doing. Then, I’m afraid my answer will unleash an unstoppable wave of grief that will alienate their concern.

I am glad when my work week is done because it’s hard to go through the motions. Then the weekend arrives and I am unable to approach it with my usual joy and abandon. Nothing is fun anymore.

I desperately want to turn back time before Jan. 3, or play it forward a couple of years because I absolutely hate this place we are in right now.

To my family: I am so grateful for each and every one of you. Our family is the bomb!

We need each other right now – you are absolutely everything to me.

And in turn, Danny, Conor, Ellie, David, Michelle and Joe – we want to be everything to you. Just let us know how….

We have been there from the beginning and we’re in it for the duration.

With love,
Carol

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

to conor and michelle,

i don’t know either of you, and i do not know danny, but i have been reading your blog based on a friend’s facebook post to the link. i cannot tell you how unbelievably impressed i am with your ability to reflect, share, and encourage others. you two seem simply amazing, and you are the most important thing for danny right now. he seems like he is a wonderful person based on what everyone has written, and he is definitely in my thoughts and will be.

i just saw the link this morning, and i actually was almost late to class because i couldn’t stop reading it. i just started nursing school this semester, but i graduated from the university of vermont in 2009, so i have a passion for skiiers and riders, as well as helmet safety! it sucks so much to have this happen, but i think it’s great that everyone will take away the lesson of how important it is to wear a helmut (plus, they are super warm!)

i have worked in a hospital for a few years, and i spent a lot of time in the ICU with patients, so i can picture exactly where you are and what tubes are being pulled when you describe it. it’s interesting (i won’t say fun) to read the medical aspect of your blog, but i also am truly amazed by your compassion, strength, patience, and honesty. you two (and i’m sure danny’s parents and friends/family) are going to pull him through this one day at a time for a long time. the fact that you both are so involved in really remarkable, and i know danny knows how important that is.

also, michelle, way to go on getting to cuddle with him! that is such an important thing for him, but really for you. i can’t imagine how you and conor are feeling, but i’m glad you guys have each other. and of course the nurses! the graveyard shift was the one i worked, and it is a really special one. my votes: nurse, and the one in blue scrubs on the left (haha).

you guys don’t need to post this on the site, but i wanted to let you know that i’m proud to “know” you all, and i’m so grateful to read your blog to put things into perspective, help raise awareness, learn some new things, and to keep up with danny’s progress. just know that a student at duke nursing school who loves to ski (sorry) with a helmet on (!!!) is thinking about all of you and your journey in montana. you two are really incredible, and i just hope that every patient i take care of has a support system like danny has. if you ever end up at duke, post it, and i’ll say hi!

take care, good luck, and do make sure to take time for yourselves 🙂 and get shredder danny!
michelle and conor are the bomb, also – just remember that!

thanks for taking the time to read, and i look forward to reading more about danny’s awesome progress. hang in there.
warmly,
kit

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

I’ve been following the website closely, trying to keep up to date on Danny’s progress. I have enjoyed reading the stories of memories in highschool which seems so so long ago to me. Though our paths have not crossed in probably 8 years I can vividly remember some qualities of Danny I know will get him through much of his recovery.

I can remember the first time I went to Danny’s house way back when…. he gave the grand tour including his room, along with “the room where he kept his clothes”. I kid you not, Danny’s closet was more organized than any of my girl friends’ closets. I believe I stared blankly at the color coordination of his t-shirts and jean washes for what seemed 2 minutes and then looked over at him, most likely with an eyebrow raised. I cannot remember exactly what I said to tease him about all of this, but most likely the rebuttle was humerous and in the defense of liking to be neat. So I would imagine that along the road of recovery, Danny’s need to be “just so” will play out well for him 🙂

I also remember Danny’s first car that he shared with Conor (the best car ever- jeep cherokee sport!) Though it was my perfect car, Danny was determined from day one of having his license to own a 2 door chevy blazer. It’s all he ever talked about if cars came into the conversation. I could never understand the desire to own a 2 door SUV, but Danny would explain that the 2 door looked “sweeter” than the 4 door (I do have to agree on that one). And whadda-ya-know. He got his wish. And it was a sweet 2 door blazer with the “DCT” plate. Keep working hard Danny! It will all fall into place.

I also have to thank Danny for teaching me some very important worldly information. Along with the 2 door blazer discussions, the topic of “rims” came up. Clearly, being an 18 year old girl from central NH, I had no idea what the difference was between hubcaps and rims. Danny just WOULD NOT have that. I believe that my thought was if the tires looked dingy and cheap, they were hubcaps and if they were shiny and fancy they were rims. Danny quickly taught me that yes in deed walmart can sell faux chrome hubcap spinners and to NEVER EVER confuse them with true rims. HAHA! I still laugh to this day if I see cheap chrome spinners.

So Danny, you have taught me so much thus far! I have no doubt that you will continue to teach all of us around you, all the while making us laugh as you do so well. Be well!!

January 21st, 2011 by Conor

Love you, Conor–here is stuff for words. Love, love, love what you have been doing and I am just sorry you are doing it. Here goes:

I realized I was harboring for far too long this Wizard of Oz fantasy of Danny’s recovery from his injury. You know, Danny would wake up and be surrounded by the loyal cast of characters and he would recount the whacky dream he had. Tin Man, Lion, and Scarecrow—you’d all be there! (And no, I had not done any casting in this realm!) I just kept replaying the last five minutes of that movie in my head.

I love the dispatches of hope & progress, but know that the Wizard of Oz moment will not happen in that way. Danny will, however, be surrounded by a very fine cast – those who have been in Montana and this extended community.

This morning I was listening to the new CD from The Decemberists, and the first track resonated with Danny’s—and our— new challenge. Here’s an excerpt:

Here we come to a turning of the season
Witness to the arc towards the sun
A neighbor’s blessed burden within reason
Becomes a burden borne of all and one

And nobody knows, nobody knows
Let the yoke fall from our shoulders
Don’t carry it all, don’t carry it all
We are all our hands and holders
Beneath this bold and brilliant sun

Love & hugs,

Julie

January 21st, 2011 by MIchelle

Wow, what a night last night. Just made it in and finished cleaning up Danny’s room. He’s fast asleep and sounds like he has been for most of the day. We watched a little bit of The Simpsons before he closed his eyes. I talked with him a bit and he doesn’t remember much, if anything at all, about yesterday. I asked him if he remembers cuddling and he doesn’t, but was quick to pat the bed and ask for more. Everyday we walk him through the same conversations as the day prior and he slowly starts to get his bearings again before he forgets everything. He’s got some really bad headaches which are being treated with pain meds every three hours, but they don’t ever really go away. On a pain scale of 1-10 they are rated a 10 nearly every time he’s asked. Yesterday he was refusing the meds, but today he seems more compliant. It’s good to see him sleep, I think he just has some catching up to do since he opened his eyes for the first time since the craniotomy. The doctor just came in to check up on him. Sounds like Danny will now have someone is his room 24 hours a day other than one of the four of us. Good thing because he’s anxious and ready to get out of bed!

Unfortunately, real flowers aren’t allowed in the ICU, but my friend Matt stopped by the other day for a surprise visit and left us with these beautiful flowers. They have been kept in the waiting area for everyone to enjoy.

Because real flowers aren’t allowed, this solar powered flower has been kept on the windowsill. Danny laughed when I showed him the fake flower. It’s perfect for ICU. Also, these little creatures have brought many smiles. Fuz is the snowboarding moose on the left and Dunlop is the sock monkey on the right (named by Conor). What should we name little blue monster in the middle?

A box of instruments was also sent. Here is Danny customized tambourine. I thought about breaking out all of the instruments at once, but decided against it thinking I would probably get a headache if not Danny. We’ll put these to good use in the future.

The Creative Cursing book made me laugh super hard. Danny and Conor laughed too, but it really never got old for me.

Who knew that there was even such a thing as the Cereal Lover’s Survival Kit? If there’s one person that is in need of this kit it is Danny. If you’ve read his interview on ShreddyTimes.com then you know that if Danny were trapped on an island for the rest of his life and he could only have one thing it would be cereals. “You name it, I’m down. Hopefully it wouldn’t be just one kind…”