Keep On Keepin’ On

January 30th, 2011 by Conor

The emails aren’t coming in so regularly, the donations aren’t pouring in like they did. I knew this was going to happen. People have moved on. Totally understandable. As far as the world is concerned Danny is “better.” Yes, healing and on the road to recovery- still a long rocky road ahead re learning things like speaking and short term memory.

Just like I predicted, this is when Danny needs us the most. He found out yesterday that he probably won’t be snowboarding for at least a year. He also found out that his Subaru is totaled and that he had been moved out of his room in Tahoe. No big deal. I probably would be devastated to find out any other the things he has had to deal with let alone all of them them at one time.

Danny was definitely a little bummed out yesterday but he does seem to be dealing with it about as well as someone could expect. The one thing that he is holding onto at the moment is his sense of humor. He is in a pretty consistently good mood when he is awake. Its great to seem him look at himself in the mirror and point out that he looks like a “terrorist” or an “alien.” I have nicknamed him “Mac” due to the odd shape of his head due to the swelling. He smiled a pretty big smile when I came up with that name.

It’s been hard to write as much as normal because we want to be with Danny. He needs the company and love and support. He needs us to pick him up, take him for walks, get him excited for the future, and encourage him that even though it sucks, It’s not anywhere NEAR as bad as it could be.

Over the next could weeks we hope to get out of here. A lot is going to happen in that time. We will continue to track Danny’s progress and hope that at some point he might contribute.

When appropriate, we will begin to post some pictures of Danny. That’s it for now. Catch you all later on. Time to go hang out with Danny.

~Conor

13 Responses to “Keep On Keepin’ On”

  1. Laurie Trapasso Pochelon Says:

    Hi Guys,
    Wondering what the plans are for rehab? Will Danny go to Tahoe, NH or? Temporary or long term compensatory strategies will help you Danny with speech and memory deficits. Still rooting for ya.

  2. Christie Girouard Says:

    Conor,
    As you graciously expressed, the intensity of well wishers does wane over time. People do move on, and get back to their own troubles and triumphs. However, those who remain, from this point on, will become the unwavering source of strength and courage for you and your family.

    A dear friend of mine lost her significant other last winter from a fatal cardiac episode. She turned to those with whom she believed would see her through the darkness. Unimaginably, most of them averted their eyes and quickly passed her by with an uncomfortable, “How’s it going?” never stopping to hear the answer. She turned to literature and read a passage in a book about coping with grief. A very poignant phrase which has stuck with me ever since: Grief re-writes your address book.

    From the din will rise the most extraordinary support system. Some new, some unexpected, and some who have returned. An impenetrable circle of faith that will lift you up when you are weary. Citing your progress and the tremendous distance that you have come from then till now.

    Keep on keepin’ on Conor. You are a brilliant shining star. Remember to be kind to yourself when you are exhausted. And look to your circle in keeping faith.

    Warmest regards,
    Christie Girouard

  3. David Soroka Says:

    Mac and Me…HA, I remember watching that in your basement one time back in the day. Give Danny a coke and some skittles, he should be all set.

  4. Alex Ware Says:

    Conor,
    Although I barely know you or Danny, my life long friendship with your mother keeps me coming back here almost everyday to follow the progress. Know that you’re not forgotten. And know that if anything as tragic and challenging as this ever happens to me, I pray that I will have a family and circle of friends who are as loving and dedicated as you.
    This isn’t just Danny’s life that has changed. And you haven’t put your life on hold, as much as you have taken an unexpected turn. Whatever bond you had with your brother in the past is even stronger now and will be for all time.
    God bless you.

  5. bridget Says:

    Ditto what Laurie said. I’m a Speech Language Pathologist at a hospital and agree 100% that rehab MUST continue at some level. Insurance companies can be such a pain in the butt! I am so very thankful Danny has you guys to advocate for him. Blessings to you all on this journey.
    (Don’t know Danny either! I used to babysit for the Lazzareschi family when I was in HS in Tahoe … boy it is a small world).

  6. Pat (Flynn) Sylvester Says:

    Conor – Kind of ditto what Alex said. Although I don’t you boys (as adults), my friendship with your father keeps me coming back daily to follow updates and root for the home team. I understand that this could have happened to any one of us as parents – so the immediacy of it hasn’t really faded for me, but still feeling somewhat helpless. So, following updates and paying attention to fundraising opportunities in the valley…Anyway, still very much here and still in awe of everything you’re all doing as a family/friend support system.

  7. Kathy (Josh's Mom) Says:

    Had a special prayer in for all of you yesterday here in sunny Tennessee! Danny is on our prayer list at church and we have some serious prayer warriors so expect great things! Love you all and still checking in on him all the time. I have a sneaking suspicion that you all are quite weary about now so I send you positive strength and determination to stay the road and finish with victory. I understand a thing or two about perseverance through some immeasurable, life-crushing experiences – you can do this and God is with you all the way. May He be with the hands that heal and your hearts that love.
    Kathy

  8. Carol Says:

    WE aren’t going anywhere!!!!!
    xxoo

  9. Emily Says:

    Hi Conor! I don’t know Danny or your family, I heard about him through my friends, friend blog (does that even make sense?!). Anyways, even though I have no idea who Danny is I still read this everyday and think about Danny and pray for him and your family. If I could make a donation I would, but I’ve been unemployed since September. I plan to keep checking this everyday and keep praying for him, he sounds like an amazing, strong and brave guy.

  10. no name Says:

    Hello Conor, Michelle and Danny,

    I am a neighbor up the road from Mary Ellen, who is close and much loved to us. I grew up with her kids, walked together to the school bus stop with them together, played on her tennis courts etc. My dad was her dentist. But so much for my identity. I am sending on a note I penned to her because I don’t do facebook or blogs or other such, just old fashioned e-mail and I will not write further.
    I am sending you on my message to her that I assumed she would somehow send on to you. You can read it down below.
    I am following your blog daily as are many of my North Country friends. My daughter is a neuro psychologist working at Shepherd Center in Atlanta – was at Lakeview – and I sounded down to her the idea of your writing a book about all this. She was positive plus. There are many affected by TBI and this is a wonderful accounting of your experiences first hand with the traumas of all of it. Much valuable information has been written down in the blogs and you have so much to add, I am sure that you had no time to write.
    Read my letter to Mary Ellen and take it seriously.

    Mary Ellen,
    I am not one to write on a blog, hence I am writing to you.

    I think these kids should write a book that will become a bestseller. The time is not now, but later when Danny can take part in it. Authors will be Michelle, Conor, and Danny.
    If Sarah Palin can make a bootle, then the content of this book will pull in far more with the right PR advertisement.
    It will be an inspiration to all TBI people, and there are plenty of them out there from the war zones. It will attest to the miraculousness of modern medical procedures and handling of this type of tragedy. It will attest also to the wonders that an intensive rehab program can produce. It will promote that hospital which seems to be right on top of things with regard to what had to be done for Danny. It will promote helmets for snowboarders. And last but not least it can go in to the hardship and suffering and ups and downs but the living proof of the possibility of a miraculous recovery in Danny.
    The book needs much work and more details but much of it is already written and is in continuation. Blogs can be used and pictures when Danny is back to normal can be of use, too.
    These kids are dedicated and are creative and I think they should go for it, taking their time to create a concept and to carefully work out the details.

    I would like to be the first one to order a copy.
    :-)
    Much love to you,
    Jane

  11. Ali Gee Says:

    I read this blog everyday and I’m always excited to see Danny progress. Conor and Michelle are both fantastic writers and I feel like I’ve gotten to know all three of you so well through your words. This has been a horrible tragedy, but you are all so blessed to care so deeply for each other, and you are reaching a level in your relationships that not many will. I will continue to read everyday and can’t wait to see him shred again. Kudos to all of you for your strength and courage and God Bless!

  12. Kris Says:

    Conor and Michelle,

    You guys should be thrown into the Danny is the bomb saying…because with out you two and your drive to support your friend & brother….I read this blog just about everyday and enjoy the updates. Sometime I even feel like Im outside the room just observing, all you guys.
    Yes people move on, because they are not directly affected, its easy. You two are neck deep into it…dont give up about the people out there not worrying….not wondering….I know that there are some upcoming events in North Conway, and that will rekindle the interest, and you will have new people with new interest in your life’s…even if its temporary you all will have touched our lives, my 19 yr son has sparked an interest in Danny story, he has said that Danny sounds just like him. They both are spirited guys, who have a love for life…. Take a deep breath, give each other a hug and know that there are people out here that are here, for all of you!!!

    Stay strong, and thank you for your posts!!

    kris
    Foxboro Ma
    Wildcat MT ski family!

  13. Slim and Alexa Says:

    Thank you, Conor, for your honesty about this. I think we are all so relieved that everything is going so well that, instead of being glued to your website, as many have been, we are dropping back into our lives. We need to be reminded that our involvement is critical now. It’s hard for you to know that every day I talk to someone, someone new, about Danny. So keep your chin up. We’re here but reminding us is good. Lots of love.

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